Birthday Wishes

“On the night you were born, the moon smiled with such wonder that the stars peeked in to see you and the night whispered, “Life will never be the same.” Because there had never been anyone like you ever in the world.”

             On the Night You Were Born by Nancy Tillman, was the first book I read to my grandson, Malachi. I sat by his isolette daily reading to him and when I was able to, hold his tiny little hand in mine. This strong little warrior was born into this world weighing just over one pound. His determination and sheer stubbornness to survive, taught our family priceless lessons that we will hold close to our hearts forever.

Today would have been Malachi’s second birthday. I try to imagine his little face at two, what his little personality could have been like. It would be so easy to focus on all my thoughts on regrets, all the would-have-beens and mourn their loss. I want to celebrate his life today.

In the coming months, my family will be growing. I am adding a daughter-in law and a new grandbaby, a little boy. As I thought about these great changes, my heart was sadden at the thought that Malachi would not be here to be part this crazy chaos I call family. But this past week, I was gently reminded, in a way that only an innocent child can by my sweet Emma, Malachi’s older sister, that he will be here, just not in the way we want.

Emma had found three tiny onesies that I had bought for our soon to be grandson and asked me, “Nana, are these for Malachi?”

"No, they are for Aunt Jessie’s new baby. I am going to write on them.”

Emma paused for a moment and held up the onesie covered in little stars, “I know what we could write on this one. Malachi’s Best Friend, because they are!”

Tears filled my eyes and my heart caught in my throat, “I think that is a great idea, sweetpea.”

Images flooded my mind of two dark haired little boys in heaven, chasing after frogs, climbing trees, and getting into whatever mischief is available where they are. Yes, these two are best friends.

Emma’s simple thought that focused on the joy instead of the sadness encouraged me to think the same way.  So today I will remember the joy that Malachi brought to my family. The gift of his little life that changed so many. Our lives will never be the same because there has never been anyone like you ever in the world.  I love you, my sweet little angel.